On The Fence

When we bought the house, we had a fence installed.  Factors such as the pipeline and the honeysuckle hedgerow prevented a full circumference of the lot, much to our dismay (see any post where I talk about a certain neighbor).  But, we at least needed a corral for the whippets, since their potty runs can measure into the quarter-hours.

And so, we ended up with a nice little 4-foot gothic picket fence.  The quality of the install was, shall we say, mediocre, however; and the railing spacing varied from 4 to 8+ inches.  Consequently, the little whippet quickly figured out that the fence was a mere suggestion–a suggestion which became less and less considered throughout the summer months.  So when I let her out, she would chase a squirrel, immediately slip through the fence, then when she decided to wander back, mysteriously couldn’t figure out how to slip back in, resulting in me having to go get her.

This culminated in a recent day in which I was working at home, had joined a conference call, then had to let the little whippet out (because she always waits until I’m busy to tell me).  I quickly became occupied with work and forgot about her…until The Heckler (The Village Elder’s wife), returned the dog to the front door.  True to her name, she then offered select commentary on my negligence, ultimately telling the rest of the village an embellished story about how I was mindlessly engaged with something unimportant and consequently unobservant to the world around me.

It was the final push I needed to proceed with the project I had already considered: attaching wire to the fence, thereby sealing in any canines wishing to turn feral.  Thus, as part of the shop light project, I acquired 150 feet of fencing wire.

Armed with staple gun, wire clips, fencing pliers, gloves, tape measure, and determination; I got to work.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t so easy as stretching the wire for the entire run.  Since my goal was to also make it aesthetically-pleasing, the wire couldn’t be simply attached to the posts, 4 inches away from the pickets.  Nor could the wire be attached to the outside.  This meant that I needed cut-to-measure individual segments.  And, since the segments weren’t always rectangular, but various forms of parallelograms, I often had to cut to fit while in the process of stapling.  In short–it was incredibly time-consuming and physically painful.  Between squeezing wire clips and the staple gun, my hands and forearms got a good workout.

I also greatly under-estimated the time required.  My 2-hour prediction turned into 6.  And it was the last hot day of the year too.  But my stubbornness was rewarded and it looks quite nice, or as nice as fencing wire can look anyway.

I feel I need some sheep in there with this setup.  And then I wouldn’t have to mow inside the fence!  Bonus!

And the best part was when I let the little whippet outside to test it.  She quickly returned, and after being let back inside, laid down in her bed and started me down with indignation and betrayal.

–Simon