Salesmanship

Part of homeownership, I’ve noticed, is the increased onslaught of people who want to sell me things I don’t need.  But in the interest of civility, as I myself have worked for many years interacting with the public, I exercise good manners.  But, as with telemarketers, these door-to-door salesman tend to be over-aggressive.  If they simply introduced themselves and their services, then handed me a pamphlet, I’d be much more inclined to consider whatever they happen to be peddling.  But that’s never the case.

His smile was haunting

Despite popular belief, humans are very adept at reading each others’ intent from body language and facial cues.  It’s a primal instinct intended for self-preservation.  And while I doubt this man showed up at my door to kill me, he certainly read as disingenuous.

So began the myriad of sales tactics.  He was selling a service to spray for bugs.  He informed me that my neighbors were already buying it and were happy.  He assured me that the spraying was invisible, so it wouldn’t mar the otherwise beautiful external appearance of our home and therefore keep my wife happy.  He pointed out the ants and carpenter bees as potential victims.  He then motioned to record some info and asked if I would be home tomorrow.

I had once made the mistake of providing an alternate electricity provider my email.  It took months to get my junk filters configured to delete the spam, and the phone calls continued for a year.  Despite which, that last question was incredibly presumptuous, as if I had already agreed and taking down my info was just a formality.

Repeated polite denials eventually conveyed my disinterest, and he left.  Perhaps gated communities aren’t nearly as dumb as I had once thought.

–Simon