From the moment hungry primal Man stumbled through the wilderness and said, “I guess I’ll eat that,” to the modern Man’s willful decision to forego the fried chicken sandwich and say, “I guess I’ll eat that,” lettuce has throughout history filled the necessary niche of food that we eat, but not because we want to.
That is, until we cover it in oil, spices, MSG, bacon, cheese…
If nothing else it’s a medium–an empty slate onto which to append things that actually posses flavor. So, inglorious vegetable, I salute you.
It was after one of these salad nights that Liz presented the depleted remains of the lettuce head and informed me that it was possible to regrow it by suspending it in water. Admittedly, it was one of the last plants I had ever considered growing, much less salvaging. But there was space under the grow light, so I figured why not? As Liz suggested, I used toothpicks to brace the mass, and placed the remains of the spent vegetable in a pickle jar of water.
I thought little of the project, but was pleasantly surprised when the lettuce head showed growth overnight. Sure enough, it was possible to restore this green ball of organic matter, and within 3 weeks, I had a leafy stem and roots.
Since I’ve come this far, I might as well give it dirt and see what happens. You know, in case I’m starving and there’s nothing else to eat in the house and the grocery store is just too far away, and no one’s delivering pizza.
–Simon